Have you ever noticed that some people always seem to have a whirlwind of chaos around them while others have a constant air of peace? What about visiting someone’s home? Have you ever noticed how some homes instantly make you feel at ease and welcomed vs. uneasy about staying or even sitting down? The difference usually lies in one’s decision to live an intentional life. This decision is made consciously or unconsciously and those netted in chaos are usually the ones who are less aware of themselves than others and thus, live with the results of unconscious living. There’s a better way.
What does it mean to live an intentional life?
To us, living an intentional life means being wholly aware of the the fact that the quality of our lives is determined by the choices we make on a daily basis. It means deciding what kind of life we want, why we want it and how we’re going to create and maintain it. It is equally important to note that living intentionally, for us, means knowing what we don’t want and finding ways to keep those things completely away or have limited exposure.
Most people say they don’t have time for drama yet somehow manage to be a magnet for it. Many people seem to always feel overwhelmed and tired while never having time for the things they say are important to them. If you don’t want either of these to be the story of your life then we’d like to share the two things that we have done to ensure our lives are what we want them to be 95% of the time. Some decisions were made over a decade ago and still hold, others have been tweaked or made along the way as get got more life experience.
1-Deciding we will not tolerate dramatic situations or people who bring negative energy. It’s not rocket science. Once you decide you don’t want to be around negativity, cut off people who insist on bringing it. Leave them in your past. Erase them. Block them. Don’t talk about them (most people don’t want to hear about who did you wrong over and over anyway). If it’s a co-worker, family member or a neighbor and that’s not possible, then limit your exposure to them. (The phone is there for your convenience, not the convenience of others.) Don’t feel obligated to invite these people to functions and certainly don’t feel like you have to go to any of theirs. You don’t have to be mean or nasty, just say you can’t make it.
2-Creating a home in which peace, harmony and prosperity can flourish by way of design. We’re not just talking about picking nice furniture and wall paint. We mean that we purposely only have one TV that’s not on the main floor–TV is usually just noise to us but a room with hundreds of books is life altering. Our home is always tidy and organized. We have real plants, scented candles, peace inducing artwork, burning incense, relaxing music, etc., throughout the house all the time. Outside too. We’ve also been creating a yard in which something is blossoming every season. We’ve introduced technology in and outside of the house so soothing music can be turned on by voice command or bluetooth technology whenever we want. We’ve intentionally made it easy to feel at ease.
The key to intentional living is being aware of your role in your life–the creator and nothing less.
If you’re an able-bodied adult, especially over the age of 25, your life is by your design. Your happiness and comfort is your responsibility. You can’t control how some people treat you but you can control how you receive them and where you place them in a matter of importance in your life, and your attitude toward them.
Every day people are presented with choices. Should we pick out our clothes and pack our lunches the day before we need them or wake up with barely enough time for a proper meal? Should we go out if money is tight or should we find something enriching at home to do and save some money? Should we keep a person in our lives who no longer inspires us to be better or gently let them fade out? Our lives are a series of choices and the results we get from them.
Choose peace and happiness and be intentional about it. Take the steps required to get you on the right path…and for us, they are as follows:
Step one for intentional living is defining what happiness means to you. Step two is making sure your thoughts and actions are consistent with your definition of happiness. (You can’t say you don’t want to give up going out every weekend while saying you want to start a family—you can’t have both at the same time. Pick one.) Your behaviors must be consistent with your desires. Step three is making the necessary adjustments in your life so that it can be what you want it to be as time goes on (like taking classes now so you have more earning power in a few years).
What is your life like now? Is it an adventure or is it boring? Is it happy for the most part or a struggle every day? What are you going to do about it if you don’t want to be in the same state in a few months? What steps can you take today, no matter how small, that can make a difference in your happiness? These are a few things we encourage you to ask yourself (and your partner if you’re in a relationship). To have a better life, we have to learn how to ask ourselves the right questions.
Until next time,
Cheril and Monica…
Stay tuned for our next post, “Kangaroos, Monkeys and Machine Guns – There’s more to Miami than South Beach”